I’ve been working on another layer of healing lately. Learning to really practice what I preach and drop into the body. We live in a disconnected society and often spend so much of our time abusing and belittling our bodies instead of bathing them in gratitude and love – and we are programmed to do so from a young age. I remember raising an eyebrow when I first heard this term. I mean, I was aware of meditation, breathing, and checking in to see how my body felt, but I had never gone deeper, not yet.

Now is the season of reclamation. Awaken. Plug into your inner knowing, there is no need to seek answers anywhere but within. You may have spent years buried by the conditioning of your parents, your society, your religion, your relationships, but those layers can be removed and your core, brightest self, is waiting for you patiently. Lovingly.

Drop into the body.

Get quiet. Be still. Feel into your belly, your womb space, your pussy. Remove judgement, focus.

Listen now. Just listen to the stillness.

Be aware of the thoughts that drift in and out of your mind, allowing them to pass by without any attachment.

Ask your body what a yes feels like. Today, a yes felt like a tingling in my womb area, leading down into my yoni, while a no felt like a little tightening in my lower back.

I sat still in meditation; being present in this moment, focusing on my breath.

In. Hold…
And out.

Then I began to

ask.

Yes and no questions. Prodding my soul for answers, asking about timelines, situations, relationships, life…

My body firing answers back and forth within me; the energy danced from point to point as I planted deeper roots into my own truth. When I was finished, I thanked my sacred body for being a channel to my highest self, as I felt a warm feeling of love and gratitude surround her. This energy, this wisdom, this truth – my truth. These gifts are always available to me any time I desire or need them.

This magic is available to you as well, my queens. Your intuition, your love, your emotions are your super power.

All we have to do is slow down. Start with meditation, begin to hone in and be present in your body, tune into your feelings, into your heart. Journal, wrangle the thoughts that are running wild in your mind. Put them on paper, organize your goals, visualize where you want to go, who you want to grow into, what you need to work on, be honest with yourself, embrace your shadows and your light. Where are your energetic leaks? Who makes you feel good? Who makes you feel depleted? Take notice.

Improve, baby. It’s all you.

I love you.

Hi, my name is Aura Lillian Joan and my sacral chakra is out of balance.

I have difficulty playing.

Sometimes I have a hard time experiencing pleasure and it’s something I’m really working on right now.

And sometimes I struggle with slowing down and being present.

The sacral chakra is your pleasure center; creativity and play, sensuality and beauty reside here. I’ve realized my sacral has been majorly out of balance for a long time. I forgot how to play, I felt insecure and sat on the side lines for such a long time. I struggled with relaxing so much that I couldn’t dance in the kitchen or jump in the pool with my kids. I was so overwhelmed with the concept that I had to be adult, perfect, polished, and composed at all times that I squashed my pleasure center like a bug and my sacral was denied and eventually baby stepped my way to shut down entirely.

I’ve come a long way this year. I feel more loving towards myself now than I ever have before, I feel more ME, more at ease, sexier – even with these love handles. Shit, especially with these love handles😏, but there is still much work to be done!

2020 has been my year of survival and growth, and it hasn’t always been pretty.

I have learned that many times our physical ailments are tied to spiritual misalignments. I denied my sexuality for my whole life, I forgot how to enjoy myself, I tried to be something I wasn’t, I cringed at the thought of being who I actually am. I have endometriosis, I struggled with infertility for many years, I held onto extra weight, wrestled with depression and forgot myself time and time again.

I’m realizing now that if I balance my sacral and focus on spending more time in pleasure and creation, some of these ailments will realign in my life and things will get better. Part of this really starts with self acceptance, no more denial. No more cringing when I call myself a lesbian, no more turning off my pleasure center because being a woman in my sexual power makes things awkward at home with my male partner. No more hiding in fear, no more insecurity.

Ownership and love reside here now.

Last night I sent a text to my partner that said, “We’re having a Halloween party as a family when I get home.” I turned on a Monster Mash Halloween playlist on Spotify when I parked the car in the driveway, stuffed my phone in my pocket and walked in the house with music blaring, candy, costumes, and pizza. Ava and I threw a plastic table cloth on the kitchen table, I dumped three bags of candy in the middle of the table, and we dug out the pumpkin carving tools. Jamming to Halloween music with my belly dancing jingle jangles on my hips, we danced, we laughed, we created a memory.

This is the medicine I need. The medicine we all need. Presence, fun, laughter, pleasure.

Tonight I plan on a self love bath with rose quarts, Epsom salts, my rose quartz yoni egg, and candles. Tuning into myself. Followed by a sacred circle and ritual with my sisters to honor my ancestors on Samhain with this glorious full moon in Taurus.

How are you bringing play, pleasure, and creativity into your life today? What lights you up?

I strive to love myself as deeply and wholly as I love everyone else and I hope you do too. Here’s to pleasure and play and a balanced sacral chakra.

I love you to the full moon and back, my loves.